Pro Creative Intercourse
I read your article concerning male masturbation, and others regarding male chastity and it's benefits. I've written you before, and my husband Steve is chastised with one of your tube devices. Recently, over the past several months I've come across some interesting concepts and issues regarding sexuality these days which leads me to the fact that women could be fairing better regarding their satisfaction in their sex lives. I have two friends (Jill and Karen) that feel the same way. Karen and her husband are experimenting with male chastity, although they haven't adopted it to the extent that Steve and I have. Jill and Ken are pregnant with their first child.
Since you are outspoken when it comes to female satisfaction, control, and enhancing our lives, I thought you would be interested in what we have come up with or in some cases resurrected from times gone by, depending on when, I guess. But first I wanted to explain what led to our ideas regarding Pro-Creative Intercourse, as we named it.
Recently while listening to a talk radio station (Des Moines, IA) there was a minister being interviewed and one of the main points he focused on was the complaints he had from some of his female followers that they weren't being loved or cared for by their husbands. The discussion of the effects of internet porn were brought up, and the minister said that pornography on the internet has addicted many men and due to the male excitability with visual images it is highly addicting- like drugs- on parts of the male brain, and that this affects the male-female relationship in marriage. This discussion did not go as far as that males looking at pornography end up masturbating thereby depleting their sexual energy and interest in their mates but we know that this is the end effect. I know because this it what happened to my husband which led to him wearing a device. So, there is an issue here.
Next there is the apparent behavior and somewhat obsession among teen age girls with giving "blow jobs" to their male counter parts. This is a highly submissive activity and certainly degrades the sexual experience for them. It seems they may be taught safe sex, but lack education in what is really good, healthy, and loving sex. This is not good.
I was given a book written by Naura Hayden entitled "How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time." Basically it's a book educating men on how to make love to and satisfy a woman. In short it tells men to be gently during sex, not be selfish, not to "pound" a woman's body while thrusting, to stimulate the clitoris during sex, and to educate them how to lovingly make love. Men seem to get their "education" from watching pornography and carry this into the bedroom. This relates to what the minister was talking about.
The other bit of info I observed with on the History channel. Sometimes late at night they run a series call the History of Sex. Apparently the Church in the Medieval ages recognized that men had the built-in and God given desire to penetrate (impregnate) and women had the built in desire to be penetrated for pro-creation. Also, that for a woman to get pregnant she needed have have an orgasm. I wonder if there is a relation in the adoption of the "missionary position" by the church because it is one of the best positions for having an orgasm and getting pregnant. In addition, although not mentioned on the program, was the story of Onan. I'm not sure of the whole story, but in the Bible Onan was criticized for "spilling his seed." Apparently this has be interpreted as either he masturbated or was using colitis interrupts- but either way it was a sin. During the late 1890's I guess "Onanism" was sometimes thought of as masturbation thereby making it a sin. But the general point is that the semen should be ejaculated during intercourse. For me, I think it important that in the loving relationship with a man that a woman should receive the semen because it acts as a "bonding fluid" at the least and is a natural desire of the woman. Jill and Karen agree.
The next issue is that of circumcision. It did some research, that I have not done before. Since circumcision is so accepted and routine, I guess I never questioned it. However I learned what the foreskin actually does during sex and some of the results that it has on the male that has be circumcised. Other than the religious "reasons" for it, it appears that it wasn't performed on males that much a couple of centuries ago, however "reasons" were made during the later 1800's. Those reason being preventing masturbation, punishment for masturbation, cleanliness, keeping little boys from "playing with themselves", and even making life easier for the wife so as to dissimulate the husband so he wouldn't "bother her" as much. Of course circumcision has continued even after the masturbation issue ceased and doctors kept pushing it anyway, but I guess recently parents are doing it less and less. Anyway, from what I learned on the internet is that the function of the foreskin during intercourse is to seal the penis-vagina, keep the glands moist and sensitive, and to protect it when flaccid. The idea is that during sex, the uncircumcised male needs to thrust far less to get the stimulation he needs so the penis stays deeper in the vagina and at the same time the base of the penis (with adjustments of the male-female) can stimulate the clitoris-esp. in the missionary position. The circumcised male tends to thrust back and forth more because many nerved cells were removed with the foreskin and the glans has been desensitized because it isn't protected. So, for the woman, unless the man is educated, can end up being pounded and get little clitoral stimulation. And, when this happens the mans semen doesn't stay deep in the vagina and gets pulled out which is unnatural. I didn't realize how serious this circumcision was. Steve, when fully erect, has NO moveable skin on his penis, due to his circumcision as a child. In fact, on his birth medical records (which somehow have survived) it is noted "full circumcision per Flora" Flora was his grand or great grandmother. Since Jill volunteered the fact that Ken is NOT circumcised she tended to agree with what I thought regarding this issue, and she likes the fact that he is natural and is "intact"
Now, all this being said we came up with the concept of what we called Pro Creative Intercourse, which co-incides with male chastity. The idea is that it follows a man and woman's natural instinct to pro-create (even though they practice birth control). The man knows his intention is to satisfy (bring to orgasm) the woman and to ejaculate (with a purpose) deeply and to concentrate NOT on himself, but on her. The man doesn't "pound", thrusts are short so as to maintain clitoral contact and do this gently, and listen to her and stimulate her as she wished. Her intention is to stimulate him, esp. prior to intercourse, in order that the semen contain as much sperm and other "bonding chemicals" as possible. (If the man has had a vasectomy, the semen is still important.) Where male chastity comes into play is that the male be prevented from masturbation so as to keep the prostate and seminal vesicles full, and his mind focused on satisfying his wife or lover. In others words, it's like the story in the Bible about Onan: semen is a precious fluid and it belongs to the woman-or her to enjoy and when desired start a new life. Karen brought up a good point that in Pro Creative Intercourse that after the couple orgasms that the man does NOT pull out and go to sleep. He remains inside the woman until he loses his erection. This enables all the semen to go inside her. After the two physically separate they remain embarrassed with the woman's legs closed.
I know this has been lengthy but we had a long discussion between us, including the husbands, but with what is going on in this society, not to mention economics, the divorce rate, foreclosures, etc. we thought it important to pass our ideas along to you.